The Immunity Manifesto

“If you are immune to boredom, there is literally nothing you cannot accomplish.”1David Foster Wallace, The Pale King

“Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death.”2Auntie Mame

“If you’re bored, you’re not paying attention.”3I said that.

Immune to Boredom. I’d love to say that describes me, but it’s more aspiration than reality. If you’re like me, you have gone to great4Preposterous, even. lengths to avoid boredom. Failing avoidance, numbing is a preferred Plan B. I think I’ve been doing it wrong.

Time for Plan C. This blog is an attempt to turn boredom to my advantage.5And perhaps to yours.

From December 1, 2014, until December 2, 2015, you can count on:
No Moral Monday: A post with no moral. Stories, essays, opinions, questions. But no moral or epiphany.
My Favorite World: A Wednesday post about trivial things6Music, art, literature, television, movies, dance, theatre, poetry. You know, the little things. that are as important as your life.
Wanton Words: Whatever I want. Whenever I want.

 LEGAL DISCLAIMER: Your host at i2b is an Unreliable Narrator,7It’s not that the Unreliable Narrator sets out to lie, but you must admit that a little tweak makes any recounting more enjoyable. It’s not a violation of truth, just a gentle(ish) reassembly that allows the pieces to rest more comfortably side by side. Maybe a dollop of “fabrication” here and there, but only insofar as the narrator appears more noble, inspiring, and intelligent. Except where fabrication denigrates the narrator to paint a false sense of humility / vulnerability / fragility that might entice the unwary reader to proffer greater sym-/em-pathy than might otherwise emerge. Thus does the unreliability become multivalent. as are we all.
He is also brutally honest.8 Yeah, this statement is pretty much what you call fraught with apparent contradiction.
Further, he hates resolved endings.9The 5th grade teacher assigned a short story exercise. Your narrator wrote a tale about an astronaut exploring the moon and discovering a vicious moon monster. Most of the story was about the astro’s desperate attempt to retrieve a laser death ray gun that would dispatch the beast. After an adjective-heavy chase across the moonscape:
“He aimed carefully and fired the death ray gun at the monster. It did not work.
The End”
I thought this exceedingly clever – a story that did not resolve. What a fun trick! The teacher was very displeased and delivered a harsh verdict: C-minus. Friends who read it were annoyed because the ending did not put a bow on it. I explained that this way they could fill it in the way they wanted it to happen. Geebus, do a little work yourself, people! My arguments fell on deaf ears.

Consider yourself warned.10Or encouraged, if you prefer.



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